Once upon a time there were good guys and bad guys. The good guys prayed to the good god to kill all the bad guys, and the bad guys prayed to the bad god to kill all the good guys. The two gods hated each other and they got into a giant battle…
Dad, I made a bad choice
Yeah?
Yeah. I didn’t like the smell of the fart, so I put oatmeal up my nose.
Oh. That does sound like a bad decision.
Yeah, but it’s okay because I got it out.
A poem:
There’s snow on the car, there’s snow on the trees.
There’s always snow in the backyard after I sneeze
Inspired by Lying on Things by Dennis Lee.
Why are you having such a hard time falling asleep tonight?
Because I HATE falling asleep. And I HATE mornings.
Why do you hate mornings?
Because I only get two choices, toast with jam or cereal with milk.* And I HATE toast with jam.
But you like cereal.
But I HATE how it gets mushy and you say “get back in your chair or your cereal will get mushy” whenever I get up to play. And I HATE mushy cereal. I only like cereal with no milk.
Oh. But then we take Raphie to the bus and you get special time with mommy.
But then I ask “where’s Raphie” and you say at school, and then I miss him and I HATE that.
Some mornings are pretty miserable it’s true.
*totally untrue - she does usually only get two choices, but we never suggest toast with jam since she HATES it so much.
Dia do you know where you want to go for dinner for your birthday?
We could go to old McDonald’s
We could go to Old McDonald’s or pizza, or a restaurant with lots of things to choose from or…
Old McDonald’s was my idea.
It was. Or we could go to a rice restaurant or a -
STOP TALKING! I TRYING TO FIGURE IT OUT!
Raphie and Mommy stop talking
I figure it out. We got to pizza restaurant my birfday.